I am a very nervous person and this is because growing up I was always compared to those smarter than me. I'm not alone here, many kids are compared all the time and that plays on their self-esteem. If that wasn’t enough to get me down I constantly compared myself to others. I always thought I will never be good enough and that's not a very nice feeling.
Sometimes we are afraid to be ourself because we feel that self isn’t good enough. Another reason is rejection. As I have said before, we humans are social beings, we can’t be isolated. The thought of being rejected by family and friends scares us, so at times we go with the bandwagon.
Growing up is hard, you have to understand who you are, what your beliefs are, which are being shaped by society simultaneously. But as we get older we understand things better and we can choose what we want to believe in.
We change; Our ideas/thoughts/beliefs/feelings everything starts to make sense. Some people are afraid of change, you see, how often have you heard this- “ you have changed” and frequently it’s used in a negative way.
We all change for better or worse but we change, it's normal, it's inevitable. It's a part of finding out who you are if you don’t change you aren’t growing.
Being true to yourself is a choice you make, whether you want to stick to your guns or go against them. Sometimes you will be in a tight spot whether it's choosing a job that is against your beliefs or bullying a kid just to be a part of the popular group- it's a choice.
Peer pressure is common today, you will face it in school/college or at work. Remember it is good to try new things and explore, but if you aren’t into it, don’t do it. (I know this is easier said than done)
There is a good chance of being bullied for doing the things you believe in. During times like this, you will question everything, you will wonder if being different is bad, blending in is bad or standing out is bad. But honestly, it does not matter, do what you feel is right to you. You will learn the hard way.
When I say ‘being who you are’ I mean accepting who you are. This is harder than it sounds. Usually, we think we aren't good enough; Why? Because we aren’t what society expects us to be. Not everyone will accept you for who you are but those who do should be called your real friends.
It will take a while to figure out and things will keep changing so have an open mind. Always listen to the advice given to you, you don’t have to accept it or apply it but there is no harm in listening.
Speak your mind but be mindful of what you say. Being straightforward is good but you have gotta be respectful of others words and opinion. At the end of the day, it’s an opinion, not a fact. There is a difference in being straightforward and downright mean (if you choose to be mean don’t be surprised by the response you get.)
Today, with social media it’s really hard to figure out what you believe in, it’s easy to compare your life to celebrities. But remember what you see is just one small part of who they are, not everyone talks about the issues they face.
Now all this being said, you don’t have to be a gem of a person but you also should not be a jerk to others.
I want to end by saying don’t be afraid of change. Change is the only constant. Learn to accept yourself because you're only you when you don’t act like someone else.
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