Society is generally thought of in a negative light because when we think of society we think ‘influence’ and this word has always been looked at negatively. It is a big picture that cannot be seen from up close so let me zoom out a bit.
Being influenced can help us positively and negatively.
So what is society?
In simple words, it’s the people around you and not just those in your in-group. Society can be divided into 3 parts
Primary- those who you meet frequently (close family and friends)
Secondary- those who you know on a name basis (your local shopkeepers)
Tertiary- those who you know but don't really interact with (school classmates you aren’t in touch with)
I’ll clear this with an example, think of the world as your society complex. The people who live with you in your house are ‘primary,’ those who live on your floor are ‘secondary’ and your complex is the ‘tertiary.’
As kids society gives us a sense of identity, it shapes us positively and negatively. We follow the norms that society creates to be accepted. Why? Because evolution has shown that those in groups had a better chance of survival than lone wolves. Also, the price we pay for being different may be severe.
We all know the story of Mowgli from 'The Jungle Book' he was a boy brought up by a pack of wolves. He felt left out and out of place often and that’s because a wolf can be a wolf with other wolves, but a man cannot be a wolf. Mowgli faced Shere Khan in the end and realized he can’t win as a wolf but he can win as a man.
This story shows that society can shape you but in the end, it’s your choice to be who you want to be.
Comparison is inevitable. As an overweight kid, I always compared myself to other girls who were a lot prettier than I was. Compared myself to those who were more talented and smarter than I was, I could never accept myself.
When I look back today I can see where all the self-loathing came from, it’s the society we live in. The 'ideal' beauty standards for both genders is a lot of pressure on growing children. It’s hard enough to figure out what we like let alone figuring out who we are.
Prejudice, gender discrimination, inequality will not go anytime soon. But all these things do help you understand more about yourself and those around you.
Society gives us a bar for comparison, this can be seen as the good side of peer pressure. If we didn’t have anything to compare with we would not be motivated to improve.
It’s like the barter system or a give and take if you may. Society shows us what is accepted and we learn how to behave in that way. In return, we give it a chance to exist.
Let’s not forget the support society provides us with, we are a community, we have our differences but when times are rough many are willing to reach out.
I would like to end by saying, you are the clay and society is the mould but let the hands that shape you be your own.
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