IT IS IMPORTANT TO LISTEN

“You don’t listen do you?”- Joker

This is a famous line from the movie ‘Joker.’ He says this while talking to his therapist. Through their interaction, he knows she doesn’t completely understand what he is saying.

Most of us love talking, but do we like listening? We all love being heard but we don’t like listening much ourselves and mind you there is a difference between listening and hearing. The world has different types of people, those who are listeners and those who are talkers and some are both.

We may benefit more from listening than the other person. Here is why you should listen and how you can.

Why you should listen

Benefits professional and personal life

We know that listening skills are pretty important in most of the professional fields today. When you start listening you will notice the complete message behind the words, also known as active listening. This will help get a better understanding of what your client wants.

And not to mention having someone in your life who you can talk to is always nice.

To help others

We all need to vent at times, psychologists and doctors are good at their job only if they listen carefully to what the client/patient has to say. Similarly, we can help someone by just listening.

We also don’t need to give advice all the time. Listening can be more than enough because people like to let out all those pent up emotions.

People generally like venting out and many just love giving advice. Take a step back and listen to what someone has to say, you may understand them better and will be able to help them out in a different way.

You don’t owe anyone

You don’t have to listen to anyone, but by doing so you may be helping them. If you can you should give others a listening ear, you never know it may be their saving grace. Also, listen to everyone not only authority figures.

Gain knowledge

This goes without saying when you listen you are likely to understand better. It’s hard to focus all the time and not zone out which is alright but it’s important we get our attention back to not miss any key information.

How to listen

Don’t interrupt the speaker

If I count the number of times I have been interrupted while talking I would be rich. Not only is it rude to interrupt someone when they are talking it may also affect the way they see themselves.

When you interrupt someone who has low self-esteem, for example, they will think are boring and an annoyance, so they avoid talking so they don’t embarrass themselves.

Show you’re listening

A conversation can take place when one person talks and the other listens and answers back. To answer back we need to listen, however, you don’t always have to say something for the other person to know you’re listening.

Body language is key here, you could nod, say “hmm” or other signs to show you’re listening. In a face to face conversation, it’s better to make eye contact.

Even by clarifying points or asking questions, you can show you are listening attentively.

Respond appropriately

Even in an argument if you listen more and defend your points less you will make more sense of what the other person is saying. Instead of turning into a heated argument, you can turn it into a discussion.

Listening to people is never a waste of time, it’s something that needs to be taught more. However, I must add, there is a reason why a therapist needs therapy too. You must be in a good frame of mind to listen to someone. If someone’s problems are affecting you negatively in any way then you should make yourself your priority. This is not selfish in any way if you aren’t in the right frame of mind you can’t help someone else.