This topic has been spoken about a lot but quite often but I would still like to share my thoughts.
When we feel low it seems like we need to make ourselves and others ‘feel better.’
Feeling low/ sad/ confused is all okay. These are emotions that we feel regularly but sometimes they can take over. Growing up we have always been told “Don’t act sad” “Don’t be angry.” We have come to know these as ‘bad’ emotions/feelings.
Listen, you will feel lost, hopeless and at an all-time low at some point in your life. It will make you uncomfortable, but this is all a part of being human and having complex emotions.
One thing that I must emphasize is you don’t need to feel better or make someone feel better all the time. Sometimes it’s important you feel what you feel.
If we love the feeling of being happy we must accept the feeling of being sad too. One cannot exist without the other, the only reason we appreciate what happiness is because we know what sadness feels like.
Even the strongest of minds feel weak and have their bad days and that is okay. In those moments you need to feel whatever you feel, denying or hiding it will turn you into a volcano ready to burst later.
Here are some things you can do to learn more about these emotions,
Acceptance is key, Denying is prolonging the inevitable pain.
Sometimes you won’t know why you feel upset, sometimes you will know either way understanding what you feel is important to get to its roots
Talk to someone, friends, family and even a therapist if you feel that will benefit you more. (a therapist is different from a psychiatrist)
It’s okay to say “I’m not fine.” The more you deny the harder it will be to overthrow this feeling because if you’re not sad you’re fine right? But you’re not.
This may seem too much effort but journaling how you feel, when you feel sad or angry can help you get better in touch with your emotional side.
Cry. Let yourself go, crying does not mean you're weak, it means you have been strong for too long.
I want you to say these things when you're down, saying these have helped me and I hope they encourage you too.
I’m not weak, I'm strong because I can accept and feel pain.
I’m not a burden.
Today is not my day but ill figure this out.
I can and will get through this.
You need to get through this, not around it. Denial, hiding, running away are coping mechanisms. Don’t shame yourself for not being happy and cheerful all the time, in fact, the idea of being happy all the time is ridiculous.
I have spent years pitying myself for situations out of my hands and being angry with myself for not being the happy go lucky all the time. But now that I have a better understanding of how things work, I let myself feel all these emotions as they make me...well, me.
Please don’t go by the things you see on social media. No one is happy all the time, no one.
I want to end by saying, you’re not alone. If you feel you have no one to talk to then look again, you will always have someone who has your back, you just don’t want to see it.
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